Have you had to prove yourself to your spouse/partner? How to never do it again

Thanks to “Mtu Aliyepotea Yani Mpotevu”, you will not believe this!

“Joe wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s Christmas Party. He didn’t even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.

Joe had to force himself to open his eyes, & the first thing he saw is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Joe sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean & pressed. He looks around the room & sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean.

So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.
Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick:

“Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, Darling! Love, Jillian”

He stumbles to the kitchen & sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Joe asks, “Son, what happened last night?”

“Well, you came home after 3 A.M drunk & out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”

Confused, he asked his son, “So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?”

His son replies, “Oh THAT!… Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, ‘Leave me alone bitch, I’m married!'”

Broken Coffee Table $239.99
Hot Breakfast $4.20
Two Aspirins $.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time…… PRICELESS !!

What your phone says about you

I came across this hilarious article on Career Point KenyaSee where you fit. Enjoy!

1) The iDeos (commonly referred to as the idiot).Referred to as the idiot because its users are mainly idiots. The same people who rush to buy stuff just because it is on offer-stuff like mathuruare za Ngara, Komeleras on offer, penis enlargement pills and cheap liquor. For most, the iDeos is an upgrade from the phones they had. Being the cheapest android phone in the market, ladies, please don’t date ideos users, especially if you’re sure the bill will surpass the 300 bob mark.

2) The Nokia. The Asha series is mostly for ladies who like big ‘things’ that can fit perfectly in their hands. Asha phones are for people who can’t

afford proper Nokia’s like the E-series. If you own a Nokia with numbers denoting its seri

es (like 3310), we can safely assume that you still own a Kencell
simcard and you have cracks in your feet. You also partake hormonal beers like Summit lager and Pilsner lite if you are a dude. If you are a woman, well, you are the kind that asks the I.T guy whether installing a 32-bit O.S twice will make your machine a 64-bit. If you own a twin-sim Nokia, you are a con, a hopeless romantic or a local business person with a nagging spouse. I get it, Nokia’s are very handy phones, especially those ones that have ‘fat’ chargers….the vibrate on them is just awesome. Ok.Motorola-The last time I saw a Motorola phone was two years ago. If you own a Motorola phone you are dead to me. Moving on….

3) Samsung
-If you own a Samsung Galaxy I salute you; with my middle finger. That’s just a zoomed in ideos bro. We get it that you love big things, but really? Guys with Samsung smart phones have belt/bra pouches for their phones, same people who deposit massive amounts in their M-Pesa accounts in a bid to impress M-Pesa attendants. Those who own Samsung touch phones are very flashy people, picking calls with no regard in queues and watching YouTube videos on full blast in Jeevanjee Gardens.

4) Blackberry users, well, there’s nothing much to be said here. These are business men/ women who shop for clandes using BBM. Blackberry is a name; sadly it’s just a name. A Blackberry is not a smart phone, it’s just a phone that has so much respect for the dead that there are even outages when people like Steve Jobs die. Pro tip: Turn your Blackberry into an iPhone running IOS5 by simply removing the battery-sadly Blackberry users won’t get this joke.

5) iPhone users are the epitome of elegance; if you own an iPhone, use public transport and live in a rental house you have low sperm count. IPhone users are at the top of Maslow’s hierarchy; you cannot have an iPhone and drive a Vitz. No, those two are mutually exclusive. You cannot have an iPhone and also use 4square, n

o; you become a disgrace to primitive Kenyans everywhere. You cannot own an iPhone and listen to riddims, or have a weave or shop an eNGARAsha. In fact you can not call yourself a sufferer if you own any apple product; unless it is a Chinese version of the iPad (commonly known as HiPad and the apple at the back has been bitten twice).

6) Alcatel and LG users are on a class

 of their own. I won’t call them anything that won’t offend them. These are people with abnormal fetishes like foot jobs, who like trying new positions in bed and are atheists. They mostly shop at Gikomba, MuthurwaToy market and along roads. They are the main consumers of roadside products like roast maize, peanuts and yams; which in turn makes them the most ardent buyers of dewormers.

7) If you own a China phone we cannot be friends, I’m sorry but I value my ear drums more. Who buys a phone that has a feature that can change the user


8) If your phone has a torch, wewe ni certified sufferer.
 Come for your certificate. Same people who use stoves and charcoal iron boxes. Keg drinkers. Night runnes’ voice? As a matter of fact, if your phone has more than two Sim cards it is Chinese. If you can hear your phone ring in a club it is Chinese. If it has a ‘BMI Index’ calculator and an aerial it is Chinese. If it has a funny name like ‘Thamthung’, ‘iPone’,’Nokla’,’Forme’ or ‘Mblakbery’ ; came with more than one battery, has a radio, T.V and you don’t get results after Googling its name it is Chinese. Basically, if your phone has Chinese as a language option, or begins to charge every time you are near a socket outlet I’m sorry.

You either drink too much or have lost too many phones, or you live in a very insecure place. Bottom line, wewe ni sufferer. Watu wa ka-quarter-quarter sugar, rice, meat and even vegetables.

9) Flap phones are for people who still watch ‘The bold and the beautiful’
. They drink Stoney and Allsops. They think ‘Zangalewa’ are the westlife of Kenya and ‘Fair and handsome’ is the next best thing after dextrosol. Most of them have dandruff in their pubes.

By Njogu William..

Husbands and wives, time to tell where you belong!

If you’re not married yet, share this with a friend. If you are married, share it with your spouse or other married couples.. and reflect on it.

An African proverb states, “Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye.”

Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don’t let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don’t fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren’t really important.

TYPES OF HUSBAND THEIR CHARACTER TRAITS
1 Bachelor Husband These are men who

  • Love to do things on their own without consulting their wives
  • Love to hang a lot with their friends rather than their wife.
  • Not very serious with married life
2 Acidic Husband These are men who

  • Are always boiling like acid
  • Are always angry
  • Are violent
  • Moody and dominating
  • They are very dangerous
3 Slave Husband These are men who

  • Feel and want to be treated like kings
  • Treat the wife like their slave
  • Love their wife to be performing old tradition respect gesture to them
  • Don’t like to be called by their first name
4 General Husband These are men who

  • Are husband for every woman
  • They love and care for other women a lot more than their own
  • Even though not in relationship they like giving money to different women but not to their wife
  • They have more female friends
5 Dry Husband These are men who

  • Are very moody
  • Are very stingy
  • They don’t consider the wife’s emotions
  • They don’t like putting energy in the relationship to make it enjoyable
  • They don’t have any sense of humour

 

 

6 Panadol Husband These are men who

  • Uses their wife as a problem solver
  • Love their wife when they need something from her and after that she is useless to them
  • Are very clever and knows their wife’s weakness and capitalize on them to get relief from their wife
7 Parasite Husband These are men who

  • Are lazy and don’t love to work so they stick to their wife because of wife’s money
  • Are very loving but uses wife money and resources to cheat her with their girlfriends
  • Are not initiative and they don’t even try to help her with house responsibilities
8 Baby Husband These are men who

  • They are very irresponsible and childish
  • Can not make decision on their own without asking their mothers or relatives
  • When something is wrong they rush back to their parents instead of discussing it with their wife
  • Wants their wife to care for them as the way their mother did
  • Who always compare their wife with their mother
9 Visiting Husband These are men who

  • Are not always at home but usually at work
  • They come home like they are visiting or like their home is a lodge
  • Try hard to provide the material needs of their wife and family but they have no time for them
10 Good Husband These are men who

  • Are caring and Loving
  • Provide material and emotional needs of their family
  • They always make time for their family
  • They guide their home spiritually
  • They are very responsible and treat their wife as a partner and a helper
TYPES OF WIFE THEIR CHARACTER TRAITS
1 Party Wife These are women who

  • Are very mobile and very sociable
  • They are always attending one function after the other (every wedding, bridal and shower, kitchen top up, office functions etc)
  • Are barely at home on weekends to have time with their husbands and family
  • Can spend family food money on gifts
2 Dictionary Wife These are women who

  • Don’t take suggestions: the way she thinks is the way it is
  • The way she knows is the way it is be maintained – no changes
  • Very orderly and became very angry when things are misplaced in their home set-up
3 Pampered Wife These are women who

  • Very spoiled by their parents (normally from rich parents or their the only girl in the family of many boys)
  • They are lazy, hardly do household work
  • Love spending money shopping trivial girlish things
  • Sees their husband like a houseboy
4 Office Wife These are women who

  • Career minded that their family does not matter
  • Are always using carrier as an excuse of not being at home for their family
  • They don’t respect their husbands and makes educated women look bad
  • Think a husband is not important because they can support themselves
5 Patient Wife These are women who

  • Always look like they are sick and down trodden
  • Love to complain on everything (husband, children, relatives even weather)
  • Are always afraid and live in anxiety
6 Headmistress Wife These are women who

  • Make themselves in-charge of the family even when the husband is a sole provider of the home
  • Treat everyone as a child including their husband and visitors
  • Are very questionable and will punish their husbands for any trivial things

 

7 Boxing Wife These are women who

  • Are very offensive and sometimes can be violent
  • They like shouting and they are nagging
  • Believe in fire for fire
8 Dust bin Wife These are women who

  • They are very dirt and unkempt
  • Very unorganized and confused
  • Very lazy at everything expect gossiping and eating
  • Leaves everything to their servants or their children
9 Security Wife These are women who

  • Very protective of their husband
  • Very jealous, every woman seen as a threat
  • Sees husbands friends as bad company
  • Don’t let anyone discipline their child even a teacher
  • Husband family and friends and workmate are scared of her
10 Good Wife These are women who

  • Virtuous wife  (Proverbs 31) mmmh!
  • Caring, loving and very smart
  • Very helpful, they can even handle husband’s business in his absence
  • Provide spiritual guidance to the children
  • Very understanding and full of self-esteem

 

Once you decide to commit to someone, over time their flaws, vulnerabilities, pet peeves, and differences will become more obvious.

If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you’ve got to learn to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses, and strengths. You are two unique individuals who have decided to share a life together.

Neither of you are perfect, but are you perfect for each other? Do you bring out the best of each other?

Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare, and control?

What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain?

You can’t take someone to the altar to alter him or her. You can’t make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and “a life”, you won’t find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness, and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship.

Seeking status, sex, wealth, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

What keeps a relationship strong?

Communication, intimacy, trust, a sense of humour, sharing household tasks, some getaway time without business or children and daily exchanges (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a note). Leave a nice message on their voicemail or send a nice email; Sharing common goals and interests.

Growth is important. Grow together, not away from each other, giving each other space to grow without feeling insecure. Allow your mate to have outside interest. You can’t always be together. Give each other a sense of belonging and assurances of commitment. Don’t try to control one another. Learn each other’s family situation. Respect his or her parents regardless. Don’t put pressure on each other for material goods. Remember for richer or for poorer. If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty, and pain replace the passion.

“Nurture your mind with great thoughts, for you will never go any higher than you think.” The grass withers, the flowers fade, but the word of God stands forever. Isaiah 40:8 Shall we make a new rule of life from tonight.

Always  try to be a little kinder than is necessary. The difference between ‘United’ and ‘Untied’ is where you put the i.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

 

 

courtesy of RAO, AIHD.

Why Hon. Sakaja’s National Youth Employment Authority Bill 2015 is malicious

Hon. Sakaja might be well intentioned but poorly informed. I have quickly gone through the National Youth Employment Authority Bill, (available here NATIONAL_YOUTH_EMPLOYMENT_BUREAU_BILL_2015_-_Hon._Sakaja) and I find it short and readable, which is laudable. However, reading through the schedules, I find little reference to concrete processes and multi-sectoral, whole of government involvement. Hence, I find it rather inadequate in the following areas:​​

  • It seeks to keep a register of youth seeking employment – it should be clear how this will be done. Part  II provides  for access to services of the Authority in all parts of Kenya to ensure that all youth including those residing in marginalized areas are served. It is not clear how this will be achieved, considering the effects of youth migration, demise, attrition or fatigue
    Proposal: Establish County branches/offices to facilitate this process and for ownership. Charge County governments with responsibility of contributing to these County branches. In tandem with keeping a register of job seekers, map out potential critical mass employers and how to incentivize them;
  • There are a number of agencies already doing the proposed agency’s work (PART IV) that it would be redundant or a waste of resources. Proposal: Strengthen existing bureaus and agencies through certain mechanisms and provide a state regulatory role through the Authority with regard to minimum requirements for licensing and accreditation of such agencies;
  • Parts V & VI should be merged and a broader concept entailing training, internships, and counseling under innovative creation of employment or similar title be enthused. This is because the proposed framework is narrow and leaves out a huge chunk of possible strategies for employment creation for the youth, both with formal or informal education. In any case, most youth in Kenya have formal but ‘incomplete’ education due to dropouts. Where are concepts such as access to credits, loans, scholarships, state awards for exemplary performance/innovation (with monetary value equivalents) that can spur self employment etc? Where is the place for strengthened NYS, volunteerism, or sector based minimum job placements such as Kazi kwa Vijana to boost roads and transport, health, agriculture, security etc? What is the role of the Labour Ministry, FKE and the Labour Unions in all this? What subtle contributions can they make or be legally compelled to make?;
  • Part VIII addresses financial obligations concerned mainly with operationalisation of the Authority and functions of the Board with a provision to establish a reserve fund, if deemed fit, for recurrent expenditures. This is grossly inadequate in vision and scope.    Proposal: This is the Authority that should be charged with “Youth Fund” or a similar outfit, directly financed by the Treasury with approval of Parliament. Other sources should also be various percentages from the CDF, Youth Enterprise Development Fund, Uwezo, a % of County budgets etc. after appropriate budget estimates by the Authority.

Other than my own, the Bill has received various criticisms from notable activists and CSOs. Kwame Owino of the Institute of Economic Affairs – IEA Kenya, thinks that the institution will suffer from an overly meddlesome Board that will make the Director-General’s work difficult. He muses, “I am unsure that getting cabinet secretaries, who should have their hands full already, together with a half-dozen youth seated in a room will generate any new employment.” Other notable critics within the CSO fraternity are Article 19, ILA, AIHD, and IEA.

(Youth) unemployment is a serious chronic problem that requires bold proposals and serious attention in this country. I would be keen to know how the youth form all parts of the country have been engaged in any discussions around this Bill, if any – them being the primary beneficiaries of the Bill.

A personal experience: what Bank of Africa and Nakumatt won’t tell about Mkopo Poa Scheme

*This is an expose from a first hand experience. Opinions are my own.* 

When I first heard of the alliance between Bank of Africa Kenya and Nakumatt allowing customers to collect items on hire purchase at reduced interest rates, I got really excited. And for a good reason. The interest rates are very lucrative, reducing monthly interest of 1.5% with options for quarterly, half yearly or 12 months payment periods. They call it Mkopo Poa. One can select from a variety of items available at several branches of Nakumatt holdings.

The steps are as easy as 1-2-3, or so they say. And that’s where the problem begins, especially if one has some matter between the ears and knowing that you are dealing with a bank and a serious supermarket chain in the region. And they add, for salaried people it is even easier.

Here is how it goes down:

  1. Select your item (do your shopping)
  2. Apply for the loan (fill a form, provide ID and 3 months payslips)
  3. 48 hours, there is a response. Collect.

So I fill the application form which has 2 pages of fine print just too tedious to read. I remember my wife remarking that I should really read through those things before I sign. I concur and I too have a few clarifications to seek. Knowing that I would be delivering the form in a day’s time, I tell her I have questions to ask the lady before signing. Of course the form has a number of other documents you will need to attach but you are not told beforehand about them. Among them is the KRA PIN certificate and the employer’s letter. That’s where it gets sticky.

The employer’s letter is a template plethora of ‘irrevocable instructions’ committing the employer to a number of statutes that leaves one wondering if they are dealing with a gang of criminals or Kenyan institutions. So I take issue with a few items:

  1. I have asked on more than one occasions if there are any ‘hidden’ charges at all and I have so far received assurances that none exists
  2. I have provided proof of employment with far more personal details than I thought I knew about myself
  3. The same template for employer letter has same details as I have given already
  4. My employer is required to commit to remit by no other means except direct cash transfer to BOAK
  5. I (customer) am to bear those costs or any charges thereof involved
  6. My employer is willing to engage and will do a monthly cheque as with other statutory deductions (KRA’s PAYE, Health Insurance, Pension -NSSF and others and Saccos etc). This is institutional as opposed to personal cheques!
  7. BOAK refuses that this cannot be trusted on grounds of, “what if one day the employer decides not to remit the cheque?”. Really? After commiting them to such stringent statutes? On a pay-roll based system?
  8. Without monthly electronic transfer, no business can take place

All these, plus the fact that information is withheld until I dig for it makes me start thinking that there could be more to this transaction than meets the eye. I begin to ask even more questions. I am the one seeking the facility with the 2 business enterprises, why commit my employer to sign such strict terms on a personal matter? Between who is the deal?

So I make calls and a few tweets about the issue. The response is prompt and they promise to call me back shortly after consulting. After waiting for four hours and entertaining second thoughts, I text the sales lady that I have decided not to take the facility and will pass by to collect my application documents in the course of the week. Immediately, she texts back: sawa.

Two minutes later, I now get the call I was supposed to get ‘shortly’, (3 hours later!) and BOAK informs me that they have been advised that a check off system involving cheques will not be allowed. I tell the caller that it is fine, I’ll just withdraw my application.

Naturally, the salespeople stationed at the outlets are far eager to sign a client up and when you start asking hard questions, you get the impression that you are dealing with front-end plants who might not be well versed with the details of such transactions. Of course, they are following clear instructions that have been passed down through the chain of command.

As I ponder of the events and almost pat myself on the back for having escaped a possible cash drain, a few questions linger on my mind. It took a great deal of effort and time to put all the requirements together only to be told ‘you still need this, or that’. What a shameful waste of time and energy for lack of clarity even where it is expressly sought! What happens to those who are self-employed or are in business, what are some of the bottlenecks you have faced with the whole scheme? Are my experiences isolated or are there Kenyans who have come across such withholding of information and unjustified discrimination?

Any other similar/dissimilar experiences out there?

 

What Bank of Africa and Nakumatt don’t say about Mkopo Poa Scheme (Synopsis)

*This is a synopsis on an expose from a first hand experience. Details coming out soon! Opinions are my own.* 

When I first heard of the alliance between Bank of Africa Kenya and Nakumatt allowing customers to collect items on hire purchase at reduced interest rates, I got really excited. And for a good reason. The interest rates are very lucrative, reducing monthly interest of 1.5% with options for quarterly, half yearly or 12 months payment periods. They call it Mkopo Poa. One can select from a variety of items available at several branches of Nakumatt holdings.

The steps are as easy as 1-2-3, or so they say. And that’s where the problem begins, especially if one has some matter between the ears and knowing that you are dealing with a bank and a serious supermarket chain in the region. And they add, for salaried people it is even easier.

Here is how it goes down:

  1. Select your item (do your shopping)
  2. Apply for the loan (fill a form, provide ID and 3 months payslips)
  3. 48 hours, there is a response. Collect.

So I fill the application form which has 2 pages of fine print just too tedious to read. ….

Is Raila a victim of misdirected anger?

I am not well schooled in politics anymore than Wanjiku is but more and more I see blatant aggression and hostility towards the CORD leader and former Premier. If he is not being hounded by the ruling elite for non-existent crimes, he’s being blamed by a railabunch of lower to upper middle-class political bigots (who think they “know it all after witnessing Moi and Kibaki”) for lack of character and vision. While the elite might have genuine fear, politics being what it is, the latter have no serious reasons why they direct their pent-up frustrations, which incidentally the average Kenyan bears towards the Governments that have failed them cruelly over the years. Indeed, the current one is riding on the spoils of the immediate former, under which the Premier served diligently albeit, and this is public knowledge, not being on board at par. Not that the man has not made a few political mistakes here and there. He has.

So Wanjiku listens to these two groups as they fuel the political grapevine where the hitherto lies and wheels of the propaganda machine have been well oiled and calibrated against Raila, ensuring that Wanjiku directs her anger and frustration at Raila without substantive evidence of his crimes (we will come to this shortly). Surprisingly, and blinded by this panacea of Jubilee’s rule laced with ease, ‘hakuna matata’ attitude, smiles and cocktails at state house, the average Kenyan fails to see the blatant chaos right before her eyes: looting, corruption, nepotism, tribalism, back-stabbing, sheer arrogance, lies, lack of clear policies or implementation of them e.t.c.!!

It’s mournful. One of the only persons who can see it and talk about it without fear is RAO. Everyone knows this.

After 50 years of poor leadership (in my view leadership being one of the most prized key ingredients for socio-economic development), Kenyans are a highly a-motivated lot, preferring to call themselves really ‘hardworking’, ‘resilient’, ‘peace loving’ and that kind of banter when the reality is majority cannot afford even daily meals, housing, proper education, transport means and some basic needs! It is a mockery of the highest order! Instead, there is an illusion of a section of Kenyans wallowing in wealth (cars, houses, land e.t.c.) in mostly urban areas, most of it precipitated by the rich and middle class who are sometimes chocking in a quagmire of debts and loans. But they don’t tell, nor ask hard questions.

The propaganda machine against RAO has been a well orchestrated ball, with institutions created and mandated to ensure that he is dealt to the bones. Consider this: Opponents always miss all the important questions and bombard him or the masses with rhetoric and character assassination attempts, they have tabloids that sensationalize rumours or just create fake stories out of the blue, they play the tribal cards without patriotism and make statements that create hysteria among people who are already hyper-sensitive, and they fear his guts to the core. Why? Because he’ll tell it as it is, to whomever.

The problems plaguing Kenyans are many but mostly they are system problems. We might have irregular rainfall once or twice a year but the system should find a way to mitigate food insecurity, with or without rains. We might have El-Nino for a month but the system should anticipate this and build sustainable infrastructure, even for rain harvesting. We might have power outages but we have geothermal, wind and solar energy! Not to mention oil, gas and water! Not to mention the people, you and me, the ultimate resource. We need great leaders to manage these resources and propel Kenya into prosperity onwards.

Why should Kenyans keep dying and getting permanent injuries from insecurity? We are getting no different from countries torn by war because of the grisly images and the trauma hitting our own people in our own backyard. How can we take Sunday afternoon outings with family when we don’t know our safety? Why is the economy so bad and inflation so high? Food and other items keep rising in price and never going down and what are our glorious Government doing about all these? Hounding an elusive monster in the character of RAO, even blaming him for their ‘personal’ problems!

Now any frustrated Kenyan would know at least 3 biggest crimes RAO has ever committed to Kenyans. I remember none. Not that I am not frustrated, no. I know he agreed to a power sharing agreement after apparently his victory was stolen in 2007 presidential elections. While some Kenyans read betrayal in this act, I think he agreed with good reasons. Rather than allow the country to go into anarchy, he relented. That is sacrifice. And he scarified his ambitions to save Kenya and her people. He’s one of our only living heroes, unlike our great men and women who have passed on in the line of duty.

 

I also know another crime he did to this country. By 2002, KANU had ruled for over 20 years and there were no signs of any change in the offing. Unlike today where most of us can speak our minds and the press can have a field day, those days you could not even trust your dog! So RAO comes and infiltrates KANU and within no time, even those politicians who had once sworn lifetime allegiance to KANU, denounced and left. And with it came plenty of space. Every Kenyan knows this.

Another crime – and this is guesswork now; could it be that his socialist philosophy though once allied to the East, is now hugely Westward (I guess based on fundamental paradigm reasoning) and yet the country is headed East? But come to think of it. Who have been our real supporters, even economically? That is a subject of debate.

RAO on the other hand, over time has demonstrated that systems are the key to uplifting the fate of Kenyans while still in this lifetime. A few come to mind: The constitution that gave birth to devolution among other great benefits. RAO is guided by the values and principles of social democracy and Pan-Africanism, being particularly concerned about the oppressed, the poor, inequity in the distribution of public resources and the plight of the voiceless majority.[1] His unrelenting fight for social justice for all and participatory democracy earned him three detentions without trial.

So fellow Kenyans, who should we make accountable for the hunger, insecurity, poor infrastructure, corruption, nepotism, tribalism, the rising inflation and failing economy, the rising wage bill, the rising taxes, unemployment, inaccessible healthcare, e.t.c? Isn’t it time we faced the bull by the horn and asked our government to deliver concrete solutions to our ever increasing burdens?

It might appear that since these issues have weighed so heavily in our hearts and the government is another big step-mother whom we can’t beat but join because history has proved her harsh, we turn our hostility to the only public figure who is a fellow victim in many aspects, but with clout enough to face the system. Might our expectations be too high of him such that we don’t want him to fail and be a victim too? Who should we be really angry with?

Thus the question remains, is Raila a victim of misdirected anger?

 

[1] http://www.uonbi.ac.ke/sites/default/files/Citation%20on%20Raila.pdf

THE BEST PRESIDENT KENYA WILL NEVER HAVE…’JAKOM’

I blogged my thoughts on this under “WHY UHURU AND RUTO MIGHT JUST BE THE TEAM KENYA NEEDED”
UHURU KENYATTA AND WILLIAM RUTO’S ACCEPTANCE SPEECH AS KENYA’S FOURTH PRESIDENTIAL ELECT AND RUNNING MATE RESPECTIVELY ON MARCH 9, 2013 SETS THE TONE FOR A POSSIBLE EPIC CHANGE IN KENYAN POLITICAL LANDSCAPE. THIS IS A DISSECTION OF THEIR PERSONAL QUALITIES COMBINED WITH EXTRANEOUS FACTORS THAT CONTINUALLY EDGE LUCK THEIR WAY. You can read more here https://jowor.wordpress.com/2013/03/09/why-uhuru-and-ruto-might-just-be-the-team-kenya-needed/

Koderoh's Diary.

ImageHe will be remembered, at least in the political scene, as the most charismatic politician to ever grace the Earth or the solar system as one of my friends pointed out to me. The outgoing Kenyans Prime minister has fought many battles that have seen him emerge victorious, but one battle he seemed never to win, not once, not twice but thrice, that battle was the battle to head our great Nation, Kenya.

His first stab at the presidency was in 1997, and again he went for it in 2007 and 2013 Raila Amollo Odinga, the son of the first vice president of Kenya Jaramogi Oginga Odinga was in the race to head the nation again, but failed short of ascending to the top seat once more.  While he has been known to overcome great challenges and rise above hard political situations and hurdles, it seems the Son of Jaramogi…

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WHY UHURU AND RUTO MIGHT JUST BE THE LEADERSHIP KENYA NEEDED

As we celebrate or lick our wounds, a few quick thoughts come to my mind-having followed the Kenyan politics fairly keenly lately culminating into the just concluded General elections on March 4, 2013. I am not a historian by any measure; in fact, my only stint was in primary school till my fresher years. Neither am I a politician nor a philosopher, though one day in future I might consider the former. I am a scientist. This piece is long so brace yourself; grab water, and some popcorn.

Again, as Kenya celebrates its Jubilee year since independence, it’s socio-political

and economic past and future is oImagen an apprehensive scrutiny as the fourth presidential elect Mr. Uhuru Kenyatta and his deputy Mr. William Ruto await swearing in any time soon following confirmation on March 9, 2013 by IEBC as victors. I hasten to congratulate them, for it was an epic one-day election pitting six elective positions, making it one of the most complex tasks not only on the

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continent, but also in our times. It was also impressive in the sense that it pitted a mix of previously archrivals or foes, deserting friends, political bigwigs and apparent new comers.

The campaigns had been carried out against a backdrop of perceived historical injustices, cancerous tribalism, old (analogue) versus new (digital) reformists, the need for a uniting front, expanding democratic space, personal interests, corruption, socio-economic decadence and a haunting 07/08’ post election distress.

The winners UHU-RUTO, started with a stint in KANU after which they differed on principle during the constitutional referendum of 2005. Then came 2007 when they almost severed ties as the general elections saw Mr. Uhuru and Mr. Kenyatta on the opposing ends of the political spectrum. Then, Mr. Ruto delivered to ODM on the premise that justice would be served. The election was apparently bungled and the then ODM’s presidential candidate Mr. Raila Odinga lost. There was violence and loss of life. A remedial government based on a national accord was formed to “share the cake” and create peace. But unity was compromised. Then came the ICC and the Hague which re-united the pair after being adversely mentioned by the prosecutor for apparent involvement in the masterminding of the said chaos.

Mr. Ruto abandoned ODM feeling betrayed. He had delivered winning votes and the pre-nuptial agreement had been to fight to the end and not let go, no matter what. Mr. Odinga let go and agreed to share power, albeit in his mind to save the widespread unrest and loss of property and life at the time. The chaos had escalated uncontrollably as Rift Valley’s predominantly Kalenjin community felt they had to reclaim their land that had been grabbed by aliens while the Central’s predominantly Kikuyu community contending that they were being driven out of malice, having acquired property legally or historically. The ODM brigade, the Pentagon had put some of these issues to the core of their agenda and had promised to address them as time was ripe. This, however, could not happen with “shared power”. This was the first instance of perceived betrayal.

The second came when Mr. Odinga appointed Mr. Mudavadi as his deputy prime minister. What had Mr. Mudavadi brought in comparison to Mr. Ruto? The third and final blow came after Mr. Ruto being named by the ICC as a suspect of the post poll chaos and Mr. Odinga never came to his defence, despite having worked together tirelessly prior to the elections, let alone hinting at any false accusations against Mr. Ruto.

After rebelling from the ODM brigade, Raila had no remorse at all and fate would later bring together the distraught Ruto with Mr. Uhuru who was then still the KANU leader and now a co-accused at the ICC. With confirmation of ICC charges and potential trial dates, the two would bond to higher strokes in the later days.

At the same time, the 2013 elections were quickly approaching.  The two teamed up to present one of the most formidable forces ever in Kenyan elections, second only to the 2002 Rainbow coalition that impeached a 24 year rule of retired president Mr. Daniel Moi. Their Jubilee coalition strategized and energetically campaigned, traversing the country with their crying call “I believe”. Whether the coalition was born out of apathy for a shared fate or a genuine desire to unite Kenyans is yet to be put to test. One thing is for sure though in the just concluded elections and against ‘insurmountable’ odds, the coalition has delivered above the 50% total votes among other constitutional requirements for a candidate to be pronounced president.

Fast forward past the well-executed and strategic campaigns; the election process and the victory, the acceptance speeches form the crux of why an Uhuru and Ruto team might just be what Kenya has needed. I will present these looking at the team and their circumstances first then follow with extraneous factors that might just be favouring them.

Firstly, they penetrate the listener’s conscience with adept subliminal appeal, bequeathing their success to powers beyond human realm. they then showed remarkable humility in accepting what destiny had bestowed on them despite the personal challenges they face. While expected to show some accommodation for their opponents, the way they delivered it resonated with a well-meaning pair. It was a passionate appeal and a call to focus on the work at hand, which was just beginning- to build Kenya into a prosperous nation.

Secondly, the kind of teamwork that Jubilee has demonstrated during the campaigns can only point to well articulated synchrony. Rarely have they parted differently and even so, the messages have always remained in sync, like reading from the same creed. The hallmark of teamwork is the demonstration of a blending of unity in diversity for synergy. This has come out well during their campaigns. It was hard to ignore how the invite was extended to their opponents to join the team.

The Jubilee has shaped an ideology of freshness, modernisms, revolution and a wave driven by trend and management of Information Technology, branding themselves as the digital coalition. To this end, TNA, Uhuru’s winning party has evolved in less than 6 months from an unknown into the party to be, forcing serious defections from Pentagon (the ODM’s chief brigades), KANU, NARC, PNU among other key political parties. These are no mean feats considering the span in which they have occurred. They have promised to take it a notch higher to the greater good of the nation.

While the coalition appeared to represent mainly two regions in the country, the kind of feat could only be possible with acceptability traversing a good portion of the great land meaning some unity-of-the-tribes of some sort. Granted, Rift Valley, Central and Eastern delivered the most votes; nowhere in the great land did they not harvest any votes. In some perceived ODM/CORD (main opponents) regions, they either triumphed or divided the votes almost equally while CORD got almost nil votes in the Jubilee’s strong holds. Could it just be that they are beginning to amass the unity formula for the land? “Our government will work for all Kenyans….we will serve all of you irrespective of whatever differences” they called at the acceptance speeches.

The energy and resolve this team displayed was like no other. Right now Kenya needs just that, an Obama-like energy and resolve. The rallies were incredible with party colours and numbers and it was hard to ignore. While others dismissed it as importation of professional rally attendees or curious by-standers, truth was the rallies were spectacle. There was energy spiced with short, sharp speeches, anecdotes, music and at the end of it, rally goers felt like it was a spiritual gathering, relaxing and energizing at the same time.

Innovation was clear in the way Jubilee operated. They tested new ideas and jumped onto obstacles like they are opportunities. They were most organised and appeared to have thought through every step of the way. The choice of venues, catch phrases, campaign materials and ideas, presentation etc were just commendable. It appears that no idea was ever discarded however rudimentary. Instead, all ideas were filed, sharpened or chiselled into masterpieces. That is the pinnacle of innovation.

On resolve, I will just mention a few important items. Both speeches by the president elect and his deputy were eloquent, concisely elaborate, off-head with no apparent scripts or prompts and were just appealing. One shows their resolve by how well they have mastered their scripts. They probably believe in what they are saying and so why read from elsewhere?

One of the other main reasons why Kenya might just be ready for Uhuru and Ruto is the apparent weight on their shoulders and the need to prove themselves. They carry several perceptible tags: ICC suspects, tribal chieftains, dynastic leadership, corruption allegations among others. Mr. Uhuru has to prove that though born at the State House, he has worked hard to achieve what he has and can do the same given this chance. His father, the founding president’s legacy hasn’t been particularly credited with accolades with others claiming it set the pace for tribalism and unequal distribution of resources. Mr. Kenyatta now has a rare second chance to re-write history and listening to him, he might just deliver on his words to the consternation of many. He made it very clear; reminding his supporters severally that he is the people’s president, not a people’s president anymore.

Beyond that, Mr. Uhuru must clear his name on the ICC issue and he promised to cooperate with international institutions in any matters. Together with Mr. Ruto, they must prove to the Kenyan people that they are not tribal chiefs and that unity is possible with them. During the speeches, this was echoed in no uncertain terms.

Finally yet importantly, and mainly as concerns the teams’ self-propagating aspects, here is an interrogation into some aspects they need to improve in future to set and advance standards. It is worth noting that the campaign itself was not free of tribal cards, witch-hunting, character assassinations, personal interests and a bit of hypocrisy. I will not dwell much on this as this is the nature, I guess, of politics. Some pointer questions beg for answers. How can a great friend with whom one had shared ideologies become an archrival to the point that one denounces those political ideologies as misleading and shallow? How can a whole community feel betrayed by one person? How does a focused contender defect from that coalition to here, then back there and finally back here (and ends up losing) without sending signals of personal interests?

Now to the extraneous factors that might be favouring Mr. Uhuru and Ruto. I start with what IImage call Public Apathy on change rhetoric. Every election year, the most serious contenders have always drummed the call for time for “Change” is imminent and has come. Upon being elected, we have seen the same old practices only perfected in some instances. This point ties with Mr. Raila Odinga’s democracy call, which is almost becoming his second name. While it is important to note that this call has resulted in massive gains for the country, there is emerging an overbearing sense that nothing will ever be satisfactory to the forces fighting for real change, let alone a modest equilibrium. Mwananchi might just be starting to feel that we have come a long way and with hard work and systems, no bigger change is needed now.

Talking of systems, the Constitution is the pillar and this has been delivered through a protracted process. The three arms of government have been considerably streamlined to near optimum. However, the change agents are still crying foul, noting that Kenya should not settle for less than proper working systems. Mwananchi probably feels that the Constitution will work for the better hence no more need for agitation.

The other factor favouring the pair is massive gains in a short time by the outgoing system, particularly on infrastructure, social amenities and prospecting for natural resources. The outgoing government has demonstrated that sector-wide and countrywide programs can be successfully implemented if there is adequate goodwill.

Finally, corruption and governance issues have been taken seriously by the two previous terms to the point that it is clear serious vices can be tamed if we have leaders who walk the talk.

Next post: Why Raila Odinga belong to the league of eminent African persons